How do you sum up the life of an individual, articulate a lifetime of memories and emotions in a way that brings closure to a painful absence which in some respects may never completely subside?
The answer to that question may elude those people whose lives were touched by my mum for many years to come, but I hope I can provide some comfort with these heartfelt thoughts and remind people that while she is now gone, the after effects of her time here will remain with many throughout their lives.
Many things need not be said, everyone who knew her is aware of her devotion to her family and friends, of her readiness to inconvenience herself for the benefit of her children and grandchildren, mother, sister and her husband. Of these things, despite their relevance to us and the hole in our lives left by her departure, I will say little more, the love of a mother for her children is well documented and one of the most wonderful aspects of human nature.
What set my mum aside from the other countless parents was her love and devotion to those people unrelated to her, whom most would ignore as strangers and pass by. Her life was dedicated, as much as to her family, to a host of people scarred by injury and disease or random chance of birth, who’s needs she met with care and consideration beyond the capability of the vast majority of our society.
People to whom she brought comfort when in pain, and whose lives were made more bearable by her presence and the job she chose to do. Care of the elderly and infirm was where she started this career, and despite the cases where the patients were violent, or insulting by reason of their illness, and the times she came home in tears from the emotional strain of dealing with those issues, still she awoke every morning and went back to do it all again because she believed she made a difference in those lives. Later she took training and graduated to dealing with severely mentally and physically disabled patients, still providing care for complete strangers to a standard most people only bestow on family members. There were better paid jobs, easier jobs, more pleasant jobs available to her over the years, yet she chose this path, something for which I have always been very proud of her.
These are the abiding memories I will have of my mother, the strength of character and dedication to others, regardless of who they were. The pain we are all feeling is a small and insignificant thing, a transient blip on the course of her life compared to the happiness she gave us, it is right that we should feel it, but not be burdened by it. My own burden is lightened by the great pride I have always felt for her and a Childs knowledge of a mothers love that never needs proof or explanation.